My Little Sister- Sortof

A few weeks ago I attended a Matrix Energetics seminar and I was "playing" with a friend. She adjusted something in my field to allow me to relate to my daughter differently- like a sister instead of a mother. (If adjusting someone's field sounds a little weird to you, don't worry. It's just trying to put language on an aspect of healing. You can learn more about it by reading about subtle energy fields.)

Now that was a very interesting thing to have happen because I come from a lineage of mothers who abandon emotionally and disown their daughters. To my knowledge, I am the third generation for this to occur. My grandmother emotionally disowned my mother when she became a Jehovah's Witness. I was 2 at the time. I was raised as a JW, but was disfellowshipped (excommunicated) when I was 19. My mother cut off all ties with me. So I've always had this feeling that I absolutely must break this destructive cycle with my daughter.

My daughter is beautiful and magnificent in her innocent perfection. (Although she is quickly becoming a precocious toddler and her innocence is fading fast as she tests her-and my- limits! LOL). I cannot imagine disowning her for a second. I also do not want her to feel like she has to mother me because I cannot show up for myself first and be healed. (Another element of the matriarchal lineage I come from.)

I keep coming back to this concept of interacting with my baby girl like a sister. Whenever I do, I immediately shift to another place with her- I want to crawl around on the floor and play with her, dress her up and celebrate her sweetness in a way I don't when I am just being mom. I am so much more relaxed and my adult responsibilities just melt away while I enjoy being present with her.

A lot of us have mother wounds, and a few of us are motherless daughters and sons. Having children of your own is one way the Universe propels us toward healing. There's no greater arena than in your own home with your own children to feel immeasurable love and experience healing as you create a new story for yourselves and your loved ones.